Friday, February 6, 2009

Top Tips...

Still Carrying Old Baggage?
Steps to unload & let go!

They say that breaking up is hard to do, and that getting over a bad relationship is even harder! But you don't have to let your past hold you back from a great future, so here are a few steps to follow in helping you unload and let go of old baggage...

Step One. Face Your Past!
No matter how hard you may try to avoid it, the only way to truly get over any hurt and pain it to face it. So get the box of Kleenex out and get ready to start the past that is.

Step Two. Forgive!
Although revenge and the thought that you will never see or hear from them again may sound sweet to your ears, carrying around a suitcase full of unforgiveness only hurts yourself. One way to help you identify areas of unforgiveness is to write a letter stating whatever you want to that person. And be sure not to hold back anything, then read it and burn it. As you watch the paper quickly turn into ash, allow every pain and negative emotion to burn too!

Step Three. Learn to let go of fear!
Get another piece of paper out, but this time make a list of all the things you wish you would have done different in your past relationship. Include all the warning signs that you wish you had saw. In order to feel comfortable & safe in a new relationship, it is important to be aware of any issues that may cause you to feel uncomfortable. Once you are made aware of these concerns, then you can began to take control!

Step Four. Communicate!
It may sound corny to have the "my heart has been broken before..." talk, but the truth is it works! Remember the best way to develop a good relationship is to build solid communication, especially regarding areas in your life that are sensitive. Just know a great guy will always try his best not to step on any open wombs.

Step Five. Try to see the good in the bad!
No matter how bad your relationship may have been there's probably at least one positive thing you can take from that experience. So take a minute to reflect on the things you have learned about yourself and the relationship and count it as wisdom.

Step Six. Relax & Pace Yourself!
Although there is nothing quite like the excitement of experiencing new love, you should never dive in again too fast. Be sure to take your time and truely get to know yourself and the other person before jumping back into a serious relationship. And if you are already in another relationship, communicate that you need to take a few weeks to spend with yourself and do a little soul searching. It is important to take a step back from the relationship to evaluate where you feel comfortable going.

At the end of the day when it's all said and done, carrying around baggage is unhealthy and slows you down. So if you have been carrying any bags, begin your process of unloading and letting go!

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